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Click here for iwhyawli's tongue-in-check version of GWOP's 954,012 posting rules. If you're wondering why GWOP has so many posting rules, you're not alone.

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Question for Bruno Tonioli

Dear Bruno,

Are you gay? No wait. That's not my question. Of course, you're gay. NTTAWWT but for crap sake you find an overt way in virtually every episode to make it painfully clear that you're gay. So here's my question. How come I don't know the sexual preference of anybody else on the show except yours? Is Len gay? How about that singer who wears the jewelry on her forehead? Perhaps you're worried that a GWOPPER might fall in love with you. But um, dudette, they're already married to gay guys. In fact, if you don't dial up the testosterone a bit, they're gonna be sending you their unnawears. Ask Jon if you don't believe me.

Dear Kate,

I learned today that if I connect remotely to my work computer and then to all my client's computer systems, I can vote for you multiple times. Let's see, that's at least 120 different computer systems times 10 votes each plus all my 30,000+ cell phone votes. Say Hello to Week 4, toots! Congratulations. No need to thank me but if you really did want to thank me, I'd like you dance even more poorly. I like how your dancing irks the ever-living shit out of Carrie Ann Innaba, and of course, I LOVE how batty it makes the GWOPPERS. Kate, if you make it to Week 4, we just may see some sort of stampede over there.

Dear Max and Erin,

Simmer down. You were so darn cute together last week. This week, obnoxious.


I'm only watching to see Kate so keep her on said...

I wish there were some way for you to access my work computer, too because I can't figure it out.

I only voted 300 times.

Anonymous said...

Thank you iwhyawli, you're my hereo!

Anonymous said...

OMG you almost made me wet my unnawares!

Girl, you have this satire "stuff" down to a science.

Amy said...

Illywilly, Why do you care if Bruno is gay? Who gives a crap? Gosh, I had no idea you were intolerant of gay people. (Psst...what if some of your sheeple friends are gay? That wasn't nice!)

And please keep voting for Kate on DWTS! She is making a fool of herself, and this is great monday night entertainment!
She's not even trying anymore, poor Tony! He made this dance so simple for her, and she still can't manage to look graceful. I can't wait to see what miserable dance she does next week.
Did you see her dress and makeup last night? I think the wardrobe and makeup people hate her. She looked like a mad clown!
You sheeple are funny to want her to stay on the show........I know you all can see she isn't having any fun anymore.
Love, Amy

Anonymous said...

Off topic Jon wants cusdoy of the kids so Kate can pay him. And his lazy a** doesnt have to pay for his kids.

iwhyawli said...

Hi again Amy, do you think there will ever come a time when you get the point of any these posts or will I keep having to explain them to you?

Sandy said...

Give Amy a break. She doesn't 'get' anything. She's a GWOP!
Wait. I forgot part of this blog says 'without Pity'.

Anonymous said...

Amy jealous much?

Anonymous said...

Amy, Bruno has a carrot for you honey. If you like it in the pie hole. And it sound like you do.

Anonymous said...

Bruno wants to wear Kate dresses. He jealous he cant have them all.