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Bruno, Bruno, Bruno

Whoa, my main man Bruno Tonioli continues to piss me off and I'm sad to say, he's thisclose to winning his very own BrunoTonioliWithoutPity blog, complements of iwhyawli. Consider this your first warning.

Have you all seen and\or read his interview with George Lopez? It's over there at radaronline today. He's quite the little man in that interview, isn't he? And by little, I mean small-minded.

Readers, go listen to that interview, do you think there will ever come a time when Bruno says something we don't already know? I'm not just talking about his comments about Kate's dancing. He NEVER says anything that isn't already painfully obvious. Pam Anderson has giant boobs? Gee thanks, Bruno, we hadn't noticed. If you insist on re-stating the obvious with such theatrical and cliche metaphors, perhaps you could find a way to do it more constructively. You do claim to be a teacher of dance, don't you?

I blame "great teachers" like Bruno for the reason I'm not an award-winning artist. As a young pup, I wanted to learn how to draw and paint in the worst possible way. But in order to get into art school, I had to have a portfolio. WTF? How do you build a portfolio if you don't know how to draw and paint?

So okay, I thought I might like to learn how to sing.... only to learn that I must *audition* for the high school choir. WTF? So I showed up and they gave me a sheet of music. How are you supposed to sing a song you've never heard when you don't know how to read music?

My point. How come none of these "judges" are offering Kate any constructive advice to help her overcome her obvious nerves. I hear them telling all the other dancers "to connect with each other", "to keep frame", "to point their toes", "to smile", "to pull their butts in", etc., etc., etc., What's their beef with Kate that they can't come up with anything other than [carrie]my, that was odd[carrie] or [bruno]she's crap"[bruno].

Bruno, dear, what's *your* point? Why so upset? Should Kate kill herself because she can't dance? What is it that compels you to go on the George Lopez Show and skewer any of the show's contestants with such disgust, especially when you also admit that she's trying hard.

Should Kate throw in the towel, Bruno? Should her fans stop giving her this opportunity?

Because if we should stop doing stuff that we're no good at, Bruno, perhaps you should stop trying to speak the English language.

Bruno, you speak our language like crap.

I realize you're trying hard, but you're crap.

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

TLC is giving Kate a new show. It's called "GWOPPERS Kiss My ASS"

I Luv Tony said...

Bruno sucks in more way than one.

I sure would love to see a thread devoted to the handsome and elegant dream dance instructor with the Albanian package, Tony Dovolani. He just tweeted at US Magazine that they are liars. I am in love.

A Dancer said...

If anything, stars like Kate Gosselin who have trouble dancing demonstrate to the world that dancing isn't a natural or effortless talent and that dancing well requires hours and hours of hard work and discipline. But if Bruno is content with the general perception that dancing isn't a real profession and the reality that dancers are amongst the most poorly paid entertainers, who am I to argue with him? He's an idiot.

iwhyawli said...

Ha Ha Ha re "GWOPPERS Kiss My Ass." How can it be that Kate's dancing inabilities haven't destroyed her career? Not one, but TWO NEW SHOWS! HA!

Anonymous said...

The haters have made Kate famous with all theyre hate. Kate thanks all of the haters. She will be rich and famous while they sit online and eat all day.

Those Who Can't "Teach" said...

Yeah it's no coincidence that most of today's new artists appear to be self-taught.

To wit:

1. Spilling a paint can over a piece of canvas and calling it "art"

2. Hip Hop Dancing

3. Rap Music

4. Reality TV

Anonymous said...

Ewww cant stand that gay Bruno Buba belly idiot.

Anonymous said...

Wasn't his Dance Wars show cancelled after the first season? Talk about crap.

GeorgeLopezHasATVShow? said...

Luckily, Bruno made these latest tactless comments on "The George Lopez Show" so basically only about 30 people heard them.

Meanwhile Bruno and everyone associated with DWTS is getting huge exposure because of....Kate.

Don't turn into another jealous GWoP hag, Bruno.

iwhyawli said...

Dear whoever is sending the "Bruno has a carrot" jokes,

Please know that I am laughing at every last one of them when I reaD them but I am afrai to post some of them because otherwise I'll have Sanctimonious Amy all over my case.

Amy ruins it for everyone, doesn't she?

Pattypie said...

"GWOPPERS kiss my ass?"

Oh that is so so so...funny!

Anonymous said...

iwhyawli said...
Dear whoever is sending the "Bruno has a carrot" jokes,

Please know that I am laughing at every last one of them when I reaD them but I am afrai to post some of them because otherwise I'll have Sanctimonious Amy all over my case.

Amy ruins it for everyone, doesn't she?

April 8, 2010 7:59 PM

Sorry but I just could not hold back the about Bruno has a carrot jokes, or about that crazy Amy. Glad you likes the jokes. Its good to laugh at the nuts every chance we get.

Deborah said...

Naw,
Amy just gives us more to laugh at.
She just has the special talent.
I always like a good joke....

Comedy Gold said...

I like the part up front where he said "we have to be impartial." He's not good at that either.

Anonymous said...

Kate the bunny rabbit came on Reality TV and asked, "Got any carrots?" The GWOPPERS answered, "No!"

The next day the rabbit came again and asked, "Got any carrots?" The GWOPPERS replied "No!"

Next day the rabbit came and asked, "Got any carrots?" The GWOPPERS shouted, "No! And if you come again and ask for carrots, I'll take nails and hammer you on the wall by your ears

Early next morning the rabbit came back and asked, " Got any nails?" The GWOPPERS answered, "No!" The rabbit asked, "Got any carrots?"

I hate Amy. said...

My name says it all.

Deborah said...

Hahaha, LMAO !!!!!!!
Love the bunny rabbit story

Deborah said...

Kate's other show needs to be dedicated to that[whispering]green sister in law.
LMAO !!!!!!
"GWOPPERS KISS MY ASS"
I luv it

shawn said...

HaHaHaHa...I love that carrot joke...HaHaHaHa

Lynn said...

Who's Amy? And why do I care?

I love me some good carrot jokes!

BlogHawg said...

That Kate is one smart bunny, she keeps those gwops hopping.
I love it when she makes them dance too, because not only does she pick the music, she owns it!