Rules for Posting

Click here for iwhyawli's tongue-in-check version of GWOP's 954,012 posting rules. If you're wondering why GWOP has so many posting rules, you're not alone.

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Sunday Funnies

This comment from an anonymous poster in the Quintessential GWOP post was just too funny to be hiding in the Quintessential GWOP thread. I chuckled and I chuckled.

Reasons You MIGHT WANT TO Be a GWOPPER poster
(moderator induced guilt not included)

  1. Your plasma has post-it notes after watching Jon & Kate plus 8
  2. Your husband finds blogger notes hightlighted in yellow
  3. You have CPS on speed dial
  4. You were voted least likely to suceed at the PTA
  5. The last time you read to your kids was the National Inquirer cover in the check out lane
  6. Your kids know not to disturb mommy when she is sitting at the computer
  7. You want to tell Kate to kiss your ass but the moderators won't post it
  8. You have spent more on your cable bill than on your kids education
  9. In tough situations you ask yourself, "What would Sharla do?”
  10. Snarkin' on Kate is your primary occupation
  11. Hating on hats, heels, and hair means you have nothing of importance to say
  12. 'I read in a tabloid' means its worth repeating
  13. Disappointed the show didn't have a narrative like little house on the praire
  14. Kate's 'downfall' is not going as you planned
  15. Jon is the sensitive one for having broke down to a selfish victim
  16. Jon is just doing whatever it takes to derail the show and ruin Kate's life/save the children
  17. Jon let you down, but it's time to let go. If Laura Linger can stop loving him you can to.
  18. concerned about oversized families who make money in questionable ways, despite the Kennedys
  19. sending "words of support and encouragement" to a P.O. Box in St. Louis
  20. Kate can't be good because you don't like her, so that means Jon is still good no matter what he does
  21. GWOP's resident therapist agrees that Kate dresses like a hooker
  22. GWOPers always "put" so many "quotation marks" in all "the" wrong places?
  23. I want to cradle the Gosselin kids in my arms like we did our puppy last night as the sun , but I can't.
  24. I'm a fucking savior, ya'll. Please shower me with compliments about my tremendous self-sacrifice
  25. You want to 1 up Kate skills of answering her own questions
  26. MAGGIE said...I personally believe this is going to be the final season for the show.....our intelligence is being insulted
  27. Aunt Bozo Hair and Uncle White Trash apparently paid off their mortgage recently
  28. Dear God, If you can make a GWOP class action lawsuit against Kate/TLC happen, I promise to never ask you for anything ever again.
  29. find a hate blog and announce your reasons and your turmoil


Anonymous said...

Oh so funny, I read here often but never post. As a newer arrival on the scene,I do have one(hundred or so ) question(s) if that's allowed. I often ponder Aunt Scary Hairs refusal to move forward and make her own life. Was Aunt Scary Hairs life so awful that she is ticked about being left in it without Kate? If so , would that make her nothing without Kate? What would this make the friends of Aunt Scary Hair at gwop since this really isn't their battle? This seems to be the place where yoda himself would search for wisdom, so, who am I to doubt yoda?
Thanks for the you might be a gwop if, list!

Anonymous said...

Loved the list! Sadly, too true about the requirements of being a GWOPtart!

No ones damn business who I am said...

Yes, Aunt Fairy Dust/Ratnest Hair woman, was kicked to the curb where she rightfully belongs and those who follow her are equally as big of losers.

Yoda said...

Crazy and wounded, these GWOP bloggers are.

Yes, hmmm.

Chosen the dark side of the force, they have.

Blinded their eyes, hatred has.

Heal them, only love can.

mkb77 said...

That's some funny shit!

Anonymous said...

Hailey Glassman Confirms Reunion With Mother On TwitterHailey Glassman Confirms Reunion With Mother On Twitter
Posted on Dec 14, 2009 @ 02:49PM print it send it
Splash NewsHailey Glassman got a special present for Hanukkah---a repaired relationship with her mother.

Video: Hailey Calls Jon A Monster

On Tuesday, Glassman took to her Twitter page where she said she’s back on speaking terms with her mother after an estrangement she says was sparked by Jon Gosselin.

“I got the best present for Hanukkah, which was my family n I reunited after all the outside manipulations and lies by "others",” Hailey wrote on her Twitter page. “This is the 1st yr. I don't care about a gift. My family is my gift n I am so grateful. I'm with my Mom right now,we are doing face masks! :-).”

Photos: Hailey Used To Be A Party Girl

Glassman, 22, continues, “I'm so happy, YAY! I missed my mommy!-lol. I feel like a part of me is whole again :-). I can accomplish anything with my Mom at my side.”

As exclusively reported, Hailey revealed that her turbulent relationship with Gosselin caused a rift between herself and her family.

Video: Hailey Talks About Rift With Family

“When all the cheating accusations came out I'd catch him lying, he'd call my mother and tell her 'I love Hailey, I would never cheat on her,” Hailey recalled to “Those other girls are whores and they're trying to extort money from me.' At that point I would break up with Jon and tell him to leave me alone. My mom would then come to me and say, 'Jon's a great guy.' He would manipulate my mother because he knew my mother and I were best friends. He would manipulate my mother to get back to me and I would forgive him."

erin said...

Oh no! I do have CPS on speed dial! Wait, that is for professional reasons not crazy reasons. Phew, I was worried.

Anonymous said...

Wouldnt you hate to be 20 something and stupid? Either one is a challenge, but being both has got to suck.

And it sounds like her mother isn't exactly an Einstein either. Even if Jon were a "great guy", is he REALLY the person you would align with your 20 something daughter?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

EXCLUSIVE: Gosselin Divorce Will Be Finalized Within 24 Hours; Judge Orders Jon: No Guns At HouseEXCLUSIVE: Gosselin Divorce Will Be Finalized Within 24 Hours; Judge Orders Jon: No Guns At House
Posted on Dec 17, 2009 @ 11:18AM print it send it
WireimageJon and Kate Gosselin’s divorce will be finalized within 24 hours, has learned exclusively.

EXCLUSIVE: Hailey Glassman Kisses New Guy In Public - Jon Gosselin Fuming!

The final divorce decree will be issued Thursday or Friday, according to a source close to the situation.

PHOTOS: Jon Has A Gun!

And in another reality check, for the one-time Reality TV dad, Jon was ordered not to bring any firearm onto the marital property. A Montgomery County, PA judge entered that order today as Jon showed up in court to square off against a former lawyer who is suing him for non-payment.

PHOTOS: Jon Gosselin Tries To Dance

But Kate also had her attorney, Mark Momjian in court today to represent her interests.

EXCLUSIVE DETAILS: Inside The Courtroom As TLC And Jon Gosselin Battle It Out

As for Jon, it appears that fame really is fleeting -- he represented himself in court Thursday. TLC was recently granted a preliminary injunction against him prohibiting the former Jon & Kate Plus 8 star from doing unauthorized interviews and paid appearnces.

EXCLUSIVE: Kate Gosselin "Thrilled" With Divorce Settlement

The court order prohibiting guns at the marital property follow photos of Jon from Wednesday showing him firing a hand gun on the couple’s Wernersville, PA property.

Anonymous said...

EXCLUSIVE: Hailey Glassman Kisses New Guy In Public - Jon Gosselin Fuming!EXCLUSIVE: Hailey Glassman Kisses New Guy In Public - Jon Gosselin Fuming!
Posted on Dec 17, 2009 @ 05:01AM print it send it
WENN / SplashLooks like Jon Gosselin’s former girlfriend Hailey Glassman has moved on -- and Jon’s not happy about it! caught the 22-year-old blonde kissing celebrity boxing promoter Damon Feldman at the Grey Bar in Pennsylvania Wednesday night while Jon Gosselin was fuming mad inside his car.

PHOTOS: Hailey Glassman & Her New Guy

Despite claims that he’s over Glassman, the reality TV dad seemed shaken-up that she has moved on and found a new guy with a ‘real’ job.

A source exclusively told “Hailey and Damon really like one another and they have started to date casually.

EXCLUSIVE: Gosselin Divorce Will Be Finalized Within 24 Hours; Judge Orders Jon: No Guns At House

“While Hailey was inside doing her promotional work Jon was bombarding her with texts from his car trying to get inside and see her.

“He was messaging her: I want to talk - I want to talk.

“Eventually a couple of us went outside and told him to stop pestering her but he refused to go away.

PHOTOS: Jon Has A Gun!

“Eventually, Hailey took one of his calls and barked down the phone: Leave me alone – stop stalking me please!

“He seemed to get the message and drove away from the venue much to everybody’s relieve because she really didn’t want anything to do with the guy.

“Damon really likes Hailey and he wants to get to know her better, so, Gosselin should stay out of the picture.”

PHOTOS: Jon Gosselin - Table For One

As exclusively reported earlier Thursday, the incident is the latest blow to Gosselin whose divorce from Kate will be finalized within 24-hours.

In an exclusive interview with Glassman -- who was deposed by lawyers from TLC who are suing Jon Gosselin for breach of contract – recently called Jon a ‘monster’ and a ‘master manipulator’ and said that she wanted a quiet life.

Photos: Hailey Used To Be A Party Girl

She revealed: "He became a monster. After Jon met the Hellers he became a compulsive liar. Anyone with a brain can guess that he did stuff outside his contract. He couldn't do anything without TLC's approval, we all know that. But he didn't discuss business deals with me."

VIDEO: Hailey Talks About Rift With Family

Glassman is due to take part as a referee in the celebrity boxing event on Friday, December 18, at the Philadelphia Airport Ramada where the infamous John Wayne Bobitt will take on local fighter Tony Fusco in the main event.